Soul Bazaar

The dark secrets of Sales, only for Sales Professionals

January 18th, 2009 1 Comment » Filed under The Hawk Mindset


I have done sales all my life. It was the best way of making good money for a people’s person who didn’t finish College.

Cold calling always felt intrusive, awkward and imposing. Who was I to interrupt some body’s routine to use my product to obtrude people without any consideration to their needs or wants. It just didn’t feel right. The question crossed my mind numerous times. “Isn’t there another way? The same answer came back every time. “No, there is no other way and it’s never going to change. You better accept it.” I was only able to tweak some parts of the script…not without feeling guilty for going against the laws of the gods of the establishment.

However, you know that no matter how much your left brain tries to convince your right brain, that you have to deal with rejection, keep resisting and objecting your prospect, to make a living, deep down inside there is a part of you that will never swallow it, stop whining about it, get used to it or shut up.

Then there is the dirty word defining sales . The derogatory stereotype we helped develop with our actions following others directions against our gut…

It’s the dark side of sales. On the other hand I loved the relationship I had with my existing clients. I am a people’s person. That’s the beautiful side of selling, and the freedom…

To illustrate the stereotype, I’ll tell you a story…

The other day, I received a call. One of those “get- on – guard, – or- you – are – going -to -get – screwed” calls. The ones that feel like a trap, you know, no way out….it was a telemarketer. A woman.

You are in the comfort of your home, minding your own business. Suddenly, somebody ‘s flair of contempt for you the “prospect” interrupts , in the hopes you are going to buy something, because you are supposed to be the lucky number of a lottery ticket and today, maybe she hits the jackpot by catching you distracted on a Tuesday afternoon.

You are supposed to stop your entire life, “ipso facto”, and focus on this thing, with which you will not be able to live without, after the call. Hopefully without thinking. Because she is not interested in the least in finding what you think or if you really need or want the thing.

If you object too much, there is hell to pay. Your free will to say no doesn’t count.

And they call you the decision maker

Well, back to the call, she starts (I don’t remember her name) talking about some product that I apparently subscribed to in the Internet. I don’t remember a thing. But what’s new, I have too many things on my mind lately, I wouldn’t be surprised she is right. So, by virtue of the benefit of the doubt, some curiosity and an impetus to study the call, I prepare myself to give her some of my time. We chat for a little while.

Before I know, she is giving me instructions: “Urging” me to read the website in 45 minutes and then she’ll call me back. Now I am getting homework from somebody I have never seen in my life, with clear time slots asigned to my next 45 minutes.

Anything else!? Yes, there is more.

“I am not interested” I say for the second time.

Now, she is ready for the kill. “So, you have managed to waste not only my time but also yours with this call… #$&?! I am supposed to sit in a corner with a donkey hat…shame on me.

I am not in the mood to say anything else. I want to go back to my work. “If you feel you wasted your time, I am sorry,” I simply say and hang up…it’s not really her fault she is following “procedure.”

And we call it sales.

Urgency? The denomination of the word is “to exert an impelling force. Push vigorously.” My perception of the word urgency goes more along the lines of rushing a kid to the hospital with a broken nose, a friend who needs help, or Dan Kennedy giving a free Tele Seminar. Dan Kennedy is a force. A cold call? You decide.

What does it say about us! Buyers and Sellers… we are playing a game that looks more like the dysfunctional
behavior of an immature, pathological adult!

Unlock the Game of Sales

Then, in the sales corporate arena, feels almost like you as a Sales Executive, are supposed to leave your humanity every morning sitting in the back seat of your car at the parking lot of your office building. Then, put on your little robot costume, tidy and folded in a Ralph Lauren bag, waiting in the darkness of your trunk, to be wore all day matching a disconnected script to be recited with all the enthusiasm you can muster.

Asking anybody to dissociate from themselves that way for 8 or more hours a day is nothing but unhealthy. And that’s only the human side of it.

On the business side, your work is to interrupt people 100% of your time, with the purpose of getting 20% results. It’s a numbers game.

You are guessing, not targeting.

A story by Christian Andersen. “The little match girl,” comes to mind.
A little girl trying to survive the freezing cold of a Russian winter night, with a box of matches; she is found
dead the next morning because she was so captivated by the hallucinating illusion coming out of each match she lit, that she didn’t think she could build a fire to survive.

Every match stayed only in her imagination, not in her reality. A fleeting star. Bright and short. A dream
without action.

Plus, let’s not forget, that part of the 20% of your sale, (you may want to estimate a percentage) comes from the prospects objected with enough force with your narcissistic script to give you an adrenaline high.

You know. You feel it in your stomach. “How long is that client going to remain in your client base?” You know how it feels to buy under pressure. Most of the time you want to get rid of the damn thing and feel cheated. Not a good scenario for a long term business relationship.

At least not like those old fashioned mom and pop businesses. You see them occasionally making a great living for everybody involved. They all have worked together for 30 years. Their coworkers are their extended family. Their clients are their friends. I assure you, those ones were not built under pressure.

Dan Kennedy tells the story of the richest car sales person he has ever met in his glorious marketing career. It is somebody who has his cubicle in the dealership where he works, covered from top to bottom with his clients and clients’ family members pictures. A human relationship building testimonial. He treats his clients like human beings. Not numbers.

And they call it your client base…

Using urgency with Cold calls, while in the lead generation stage of the process? You are in the freaking cold, with a match box. Captivated by the deceiving illusion of the ephemeral light. Until you run out of matches. You are not building a fire.

Maybe that’s why they are called cold calls. Cold as a winter night in Russia.

Now, that’s your good base. Let’s talk about the other 80%. You follow up with a percentage of the “prospects” who reluctantly told you to send them information only because they didn’t want to hurt your feelings by telling you the truth. They are not interested. Period. Most likely your information will end up in the trash can.

So you keep following up those ones, using some of your precious time hopelessly believing the lies designed to not hurt your feelings… they are not a fit for you…but cannot say it out loud. Aren’t we adults enough to deal with the truth?

Wouldn’t it be better to know the TRUTH ASAP and use the time finding new more fitted clients for your product?

And we call it business…

It’s a dysfunctional business practise. Sometimes seems difficult to believe CEO’s and managers who came up with these “machista” ideas about sales tactics have sold a dollar in their lives.

The truth is, the traditional way of selling has actually worked for a long while. On the basis of annoying the hell out of everybody who is determined as a consumer and that is all of us. However, since the only constant thing in life is change, some practices are designed to end. Repeated interruption with no respect for the prospect can only go so far. Is “contra natura.”

That’s the difference between a technique and a principle. A principle is perennial. It is proven to be true in a
timeless way. Sales on the basis of a principle rather than a technique not only are more productive, they also restore the image we all have about sales.

Of course, change is difficult for all of us. It is hard to exchange your comfort zone for the unknown .

Perry Marshall, the genius marketing guru says the old way of selling is: “Obsolete. Dead. Ancient Technology. Irrelevant. It’s like vynil records, 8 track tapes, carburators and Disco.” He also asks the question: “Do you want to be an unwelcome pest or a welcome guest?”

Unlock the Gameof Sales

You know what the answer to that question is.

We are all running out of matches.

It is seriously time to build a fire. Are you up to finding out how?

I am sure you are. You have been wandering for a long time if there is light at the end of this tunnel anyway.

And you know what? That part of you that internally is ressisting the traditional sales tactics is right.


It is your right brain, dissociated from your left brain, pounding and kicking to make you hear her side of the story, the one that can see the big picture.

If you listen, it can help increase your numbers, and even double your income. The best part, not feeling like a jerk most of the time.

Believe it or not, there is a way. No, it’s not another sales technique. Nothing like that. It’s a principle. Here is the story.

Rather than being another victim of the establishment, Ari Galper decided to do something about it. He was brave enough, to open up and listen to the creativity of his right brain. He chose to take responsibility for his own actions .

Armed with a burning desire to change the status quo, and help people like you and me, Unlocked The Game.

In his own words,

“The problem wasn’t with the prospect. It was with me. There was something fundamentally wrong with how I was approaching selling. And I needed to change.

I was on that call to make a sale, and the implicit sales pressure I was exerting with every word I spoke made them feel it was okay to lead me on and even lie to me.

*Did it ever occur to me to think about ways I could develop a relationship of trust in which we could explore what issues and problems they were trying to solve? No.

*Did I ever suggest that, without knowing more about their issues and problems, I couldn’t know whether what I had to offer could help them? No.”

*Did it ever occur to me to ask them, “Where do you think you might want to go from here?” No.

It was at this point that I was finally able to let go of the outrage and rejection and take responsibility for having tried to sell the “wrong” way.

Once I shifted my thinking from focusing on them to focusing on what I was doing, the answers started to come. I realized that the old ways of selling had everything backward. And that freed me to begin thinking about what ultimately became Unlock The Game.”

“They knew I had an agenda for that call, which was to make them buy what I had to sell. I tried to do it by going with my script, developing it, dealing with their “objections,” pushing subtly to move things forward…you know the drill.

Rejection can be eliminated. And up to this point, no one has ever provided a way to do that.

You see, rejection is triggered. It’s triggered by the person selling.

And if they are using anything in their approach (their voice, enthusiasm, or words) that associates them with the “salesperson” stereotype, rejection is automatically triggered.

Diffuse the sales pressure, change your mindset and enter the conversation from their point of view, rejection will never happen, because you’ve done nothing to trigger it. (More on this later…).

When you completely shift the way you think, away from “trying to make the sale”, magical things start to happen. You relax, they relax. You are open, they are open. You are both drawn together by your ability to get out of your world and into theirs.

Thousands of my clients are doing this every day, and you can do the same.

What the “sales gurus” don’t understand is that “resistance” is a reaction to traditional sales techniques. They’re the ones creating the vicious cycle, and they don’t even know it.”

It goes somewhat like this, he continues in his comparison.

“Traditional Sales Thinking (when getting the sale is all that matters…)
*Use every technique you can to make the sale
*It’s okay to bend the truth or lie if it’ll make the sale happen
*Go for the “yes.” If you hear a “no,” push and persuade harder to turn it into a “yes.”

The Mindset Approach (when learning your prospect’s truth is all that matters…)
*Create a conversation and build a relationship of trust.
*Focus on finding out whether you can help your prospect solve their problems or issues.
*If you always tell the truth, your prospect will tell you their truth.
*Focus on the “fit.” Create conversation that explores whether you’re a match or not.

Visitors to my website who are considering ordering the Mastery Program often ask me why the Mindset is different from all the other sales programs out there. I always tell them, “It’s a different way of thinking based on integrity, honesty, and truth.”

It’s like this…forget about business for a moment and think about your own personal life. Do you want
relationships with people who are comfortable not telling you the truth?

Well, selling is a relationship too, and you can probably understand why “techniques” endorsed by traditional
sales trainers make building a genuine human relationship virtually impossible.”

There it is… Does this make sense to you or what? … It’s a relief, isn’t it?

Ari Galper at “Unlock The Game” reinvented the wheel.

From one sales person to another, this is the answer we all have been waiting for a long, long time. Besides,
sales deserves a better rapport in the business community. And it’s up to us to change the stereotype…Nobody else.

The good thing is that somebody already led the way. We only have to follow his footprints.

Using Perry Marshall’s words we could say there is a way to become a welcome guest, leaving behind your unwelcome pest robot costume… For good.


Ari and his Team will walk you through his program, until you have developed enough trust to build a relationship and you both decide you are a fit for each other.

Some time in the near future when you have a moment, when you are not so busy doubling your sales commission checks, when you are enjoying your new identity of welcome guest, and your newly found peace of mind, stop by and give me your feed back, will you? I would love to hear more about you.

Thanks for being open.

I myself didn’t know there was a new, fresh, revolutionary way.


The Thought Provoking, Irreverent Pearl Necklace Grandmother of the 21st C. Paradigm Shifter, Poet, Storyteller, Marketer, Visionary, Blogger, Coach. Mrs. Fire

“50/50 The Magic of the Middle Line”, Experience Coaching”

Founder Soul Hangout & Co-Creative Circles of Coherence, Soul Mastermind Groups. Consciously Connecting & Combining Intelligence with a touch of “Curry”. The 7 “C”‘s of the 7 Condiments of Cooperation

No TweetBacks yet. (Be the first to Tweet this post)
Posted in: The Hawk Mindset Tagged:

Back to home page

Related posts you may enjoy:

Luz Aguirrebena's Profile | Create Your Badge
Luz Aguirrebena's Facebook profile

Leave a Reply

You must be logged in to post a comment.

Recent Comments